Ode to Tequila

This is a forwarded email I'm dedicating to Deena, my partner in crime.


Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor orpharmacist about Tequila.

Tequila is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

Tequila can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell theworld that you're ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Tequila almost immediately, and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past, and you willdiscover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Tequila!

Tequila(r) may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Tequila. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant areencouraged to try it.

*Side effects may include
dizziness
nausea
vomiting
incarceration
erotic lustfulness
loss of motor control
loss of clothing
loss of moneyloss of virginity
delusions of grandeur
table dancing
headache
dehydration
dry mouth
a desire to sing Karaoke and / or playing all-night rounds of StripPoker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.

Note to self: Next tequila session (after a month and 10 days) will be at either Chilli's or Nook's. TGIF Happy Hours is a rip-off.